Day: April 20, 2013

 * A man was driving through Oklahoma oil country wondering at all the oil rigs poking into the ground and up into the air. He stopped for a bite and got talking to one of the local men. He asked if it was true that many of the farmers had gotten rich by finding oil on their farms. The man said it was true and the oil business just took over the farms. The visitor asked, “Do you own a farm around here?” “Yeah” came the downbeat reply. “Are there any oil wells on it?” “Yeah, we have three good wells and they are producing several hundred barrels a day.”  The impressed visitor asked, “What are you going to do with all the money you are getting from your property now?” The farmer answered, “I am gonna buy me a farm that ain’t got no oil on it.”

* Sister Mary Amelia belonged to an order devoted to visiting and helping sick members of the congregation. One day while making her rounds visiting the homebound patients she ran out of gas. As luck would have it a gas station was just a block away. She walked to the station to borrow gas can and buy some gas. The attendant told her that the only gas can he owned had been loaned out but she couldn’t wait until it was returned. Since she was on her way to see another patient and behind schedule she decided not to wait and walked back to her car. She looked for something in her car that she could fill with gas and spotted the bed pan she always had on hand and for the sick patients. Always resourceful, she carried the bedpan to the station filled it with gas and carried the full bedpan back to her car which was decorated with congregation’s logo and a crucifix air freshener. She was pouring the gas into the tank while two men watched from across the street. One of them turned to the other and said, “If that car starts, I’m turning Catholic.”

 + The topic of the morning radio show was memorable moments from your first day of school. One girl called in and gave an eloquent report about her first day of school. Impressed the radio guy asked her how old she was. “12,” answered the vivacious girl. “And what year are you in?”  The girl answered,  “2013.”