July 29th Humor
* The bathtub was invented in 1850 and the telephone in 1875 if you lived in 1850, you could have sent the bathtub for the next 25 years without having the phone ring once.
After registering for her high school classes my daughter burst into the house, filled with excitement. “Dad,” she announced in one breath, “I got all the classes I wanted. But I have to have my school supplies by tomorrow. I need a protractor and a compass for geometry, a dictionary for English, a dissecting kit for biology and a car for Drivers Ed.”
Seventy year old Martha woke her husband, seventy-five year old George from his nap on the sofa. “There is a truck backed up to your shop and thieves are loading up your tools.” she told him in a frightened voice. He immediately looked out the window, then phoned the police. The police informed him that it was Saturday night and they were really busy but would have an officer over to his place as soon as one was available, probably in about half an hour. He was advised to stay inside the house with the doors locked until they got there. He hung up the phone, waited about a minute and called back. “This is the fellow that just called about the theives stealing his tools, don’t hurry, I just shot them.” Three minutes later an ambulance and two police cars arrived and the burgulars were caught red-handed. “What is going on here?” asked one of the officers, “We were informed that you had shot them.” “Yeh, and I was informed that nobody was available.” Old George replied.