October 28th Humor
@ Mrs. Mather was going to be returning home tomorrow ending her visit with her daughter. She asked her son in law if he knew what time the plane left tomorrow. He replied looking at this watch, “Sixteen hours, seventeen minutes and thirty seconds from now.”
Two women came before wise King Solomon, dragging between them a young man in the three piece suit. “This young lawyer agreed to marry my daughter,” said one. “No, he promised to marry my daughter,” said the other. So the mothers argued before the king until he called for a silence. “Bring me my biggest sword,” said Solomon “and I shall chop the young attorney in half. Each one of you shall receive a half.” “Sounds good to me,” said the first lady. But the other woman said, “O sire, do not spill innocent blood. Let the other woman’s daughter marry him.” The Wise King did not hesitate for a moment. He proclaimed the attorney must marry the first lady’s daughter. “But she was willing cut you him in two,” exclaimed the king’s court. “Indeed,” said the wise King Solomon, “that shows that she is the true mother-in-law.”
My boss is a delegater. My supervisor’s 80-year-old mother-in-law was in his office upstairs from me. He called my name, and I ran upstairs and he was on the phone. Without hanging up, he said to me, “Would you mind giving her the Heimlich maneuver? She can’t breathe.”