May 3rd Humor
* As the stranger enters a country store he spots a sign saying “beware of dog” inside, he sees a harmless old hound asleep in the middle of the floor. “Is that the dog were supposed to be aware of?” He asked the owner. “That’s him,” comes the reply. “He doesn’t look dangerous to me. Why would you post that sign. “Before I posted that sign, people kept tripping over him.”
After the trial settlement, the attorney approached the bench and said, “One hundred thousand dollars is not a lot of money in this case your honor. After all my client deserves some money too.”
A man was driving home one evening and realized that it was his daughter’s birthday and he hadn’t bought her a present. He drove to the mall and ran to the toy store and he asked the store manager “How much is that new Barbie in the window?” The Manager replied, “Which one? We have ‘Barbie goes to the gym’ for $19.95 ….’Barbie goes to the Ball’ for $19.95 …. ‘Barbie goes to the beach’ for $19.95 ….’Barbie goes to the Nightclub’ for $19.95 ….and ‘Divorced Barbie’ for $375.00”. “Why is the Divorced Barbie $375.00, when all the others are $19.95?” Dad asked surprised. “Divorced Barbie comes with Ken’s car, Ken’s House, Ken’s boat, Ken’s dog, Ken’s furniture and Ken’s best friend.