January 12th Jokes
“Yesterday, a group of scientists warned that because of global warming, sea levels will rise so much that parts of New Jersey will be under water. The bad news? Parts of New Jersey won’t be under water.”
When he went to the doctor for a physical examination, Bernie was given an excellent bill of health. “It must run in your family,” commented the doctor. “How old was your dad when he died?” “What makes you think he’s dead?”asked Bernie. “He is 90 and still going strong.” “Well, how long did your grandfather live?” “What makes you think he’s dead? Grandpa is 106 and getting married to a 22-year-old next week,” Bernie informed him. “At his age,” exclaimed the doctor. “Why does he want to marry such a young woman?” Bernie replied, “What makes you think he wants to?”
Hillary Clinton today said that she is very aware of the “shortfalls” of her campaign that caused her to lose the election. Specifically, Short Falls, Michigan, and Short Falls, Wisconsin, Little Falls, Pennsylvania, Newton Falls, Ohio…