January 23rd Jokes
My little boys wanted to have a pet and we settled on a rabbit after much wrangling and prodding by them. As I expected the novelty wore off quickly and the rabbit was mostly forgotten. Frustrated by the lack of commitment to their animal I asked, “How many times do you think that rabbit would have died, if I had not been the one to go out there and feed and water it.” The 12 year old looked at me and said. “Once.”
John Smith had the misfortune to be a witness to an armed robbery. The police came and began to take statements. The investigating officer approached him and asked his name. He answered, “John Smith.” The cop replied, “Cut the comedy and give me your name.” “All right,” John replied, “put me down as Winston Churchill.” The cop said, “That’s more like it, you cannot pull that John Smith crap on me.”
A man was visiting the northern peninsula of Michigan talk with one of the farmers of the region. He said, “It must get really, really cold up here in the winter, I don’t see how you can stand to be in the cold and dark for so many months.” The farmer answered, “We don’t even try anymore. We go South for the winter.” “Oh, you go to Florida?” “No, said the Farmer, “to Cleveland.”