Day: April 3, 2018

A man goes into the confessional box. He notices on one wall a fully equipped bar with Guinness on tap. On the other wall is a dazzling array of the finest Cuban cigars. Then the priest comes in. “Father, forgive me, for it’s been a very long time since I’ve been to confession, but I must first admit that the confessional box is much more inviting these days.” The priest replies, “Get out. You’re on my side.”

I went out drinking on St Patrick’s Day, so I took a bus home…That may not be a big deal to you, but I’ve never driven a bus before.

@ Waitress: “Would you like your coffee black?” Customer: “What other colors do you have?”