German Quick cash
As Americans we are used to the idea that some ambitious fool would try to hook an ATM to the back of his car and drive away. It seems half the time, the doors of the bodega or the car doing the pulling suffer more than the cash machine. In Germany they do not think so small or maybe they value their trucks more. When they are going to rob an ATM, they do it with dynamite. If you thought that breaking a door down and pulling a machine bolted to the floor out with a chain was messy, look at the attached picture of this bank lobby. The scenario is always the same. A massive nighttime explosion destroyed the ATM and the surrounding area. There have been 49 explosion/robberies in the last year in Germany. This is pretty embarrassing for the police and the banks. “Bystanders are directly endangered by the explosions and flying debris. The perpetrators usually flee with high-speed getaway vehicles via the Autobahn. Here, too, there is a considerable danger to life and limb for uninvolved citizens,” said the German “FBI.” One of the latest explosions occurred Thursday night on the outskirts of the city of Ratingen, near Dusseldorf. The explosion was so powerful that, in addition to the bank branch, it also destroyed the apartments above it. The newspaper’s website stated that the building had to be inspected by a structural engineer.
More than 2,500 police officers were drafted for the operation against the “boom bandits” across seven German states. The effort in March saw police set up checkpoints on interstate travel routes to ramp up pressure on gangs operating across state and national boundaries. Many of the crimes are at sites that are easy to flee rapidly in a vehicle, like highway truck stops. Police carried out checks on a total of around 8,000 people and over more than 5,300 vehicles. During the operation, officers registered more than 180 criminal offenses and 360 administrative offenses. “These measures are aimed specifically at the organized gangs who carry out these crimes in different states and across borders.” The government can help banks protect against ATM robberies with more video surveillance and the use of indelible dyes and glues that machines spray in an explosion that would render stolen bank notes conspicuous and unusable. They added that further incidents can be foiled only by effective preventative measures and reducing cash stocks at individual sites. In many cases, bank foyers are now closed to customers overnight.
Automatic Tickle Machines
A blonde is taking money out of an ATM, when the blonde behind her in line says,
“Ha! Ha! I know your password. It’s four asterisks.”
The first blonde replies, “Ha! Ha! No it’s not. It’s ‘3862.’”
Banks should really do a better job of keeping their ATMs filled.
I went to four different ones today and they all said, “Insufficient Funds.”
I think our bank is in trouble. I was about to complete a withdrawal
when the ATM asked me if I wanted to go double or nothing.
Only a bank ATM will charge you $3 to get your money back,
then tell you to cover your pin so you don’t get robbed.
April 1st Birthdays
1962 – Susan Boyle, 1988 – Mackenzie Davis, 1956 – Libby Riddles, 1928 – Debbie Reynolds
1998 – Asa Butterfield, 1961 – Mark White, 1908 – Abraham Maslow, 1983 – Matt Lanter