April 25th Jokes

* At a workshop on dog temperament, the instructor told us of a test for canine disposition. The owner was to fall down and act hurt. A dog with a bad temperament would try to bite the person, whereas a dog with a good temperament would lick his owner’s face and show concern. Once while eating pizza in the living room, I decided to try this out on my two dogs. I stood up, clutched my heart let out a scream and collapsed on the floor. The dogs looked at me, glanced at each other and raced to the coffee table for my pizza.

# A fellow I know was going to hang gliding school. I asked him how many successful flights did he have to take, jumping off the cliff in order to graduate. He answered, “All of them.”

The best thing about moving back to my home town was seeing so many familiar faces. One day, in the grocery store, I recognized a man, who had been a good friend of my parents. He noticed me staring, so I quickly introduce myself as John and Helen’s daughter.   “Helen’s daughter,” he exclaimed. “She was such a beautiful lady.” He called to his wife, “Martha, come and see Helen’s daughter.” “You remember Helen such a beautiful lady.”    “Oh, yes,” Martha replied. “She was always so pretty.” After raving on about my mother, she turned to me and said, “you look like your father.”