Boating Au Natural

Boating Au Natural

Rick Swenson, 35, of Fergus Falls, Minnesota raises giant pumpkins with the intention of doing something creative with them once they are ready for harvest. This year took a massive 1,086-pound pumpkin and hollowed it out to make a boat which he paddled for 26 miles on the Red River, breaking the Guinness World Record for the longest distance floated in a pumpkin. Rick typically delivers the pumpkins to the Zoo for their Zoo Boo Festival where they are put on display, then fed to the elephants, bears and buffalo.

There was a farmer who grew pumpkins. He was disturbed by kids who would sneak into his pumpkin patch at night and steal his pumpkins. He made up a sign to scare the kids away and posted it in the field. The next night, the kids saw the sign which read, “Warning! One of the pumpkins in this field has been injected with cyanide.” The kids ran off, made up their own sign and posted it next to the farmer’s sign. When the farmer returned, no pumpkins were missing, but the sign next to his read, “Now there are two!”

One day two pumpkins were walking together down the street. They stepped off the curb and a speeding car came around the corner and ran one of them over. The uninjured pumpkin called 911 and helped his injured friend as best he was able. The injured pumpkin was taken to the hospital and rushed into surgery. After a long and agonizing wait, the doctor finally appeared. He told the healthy pumpkin, “I have good news, and I bad news. The good news is that your friend is going to pull through.” “The bad news is that he’s going to be a vegetable for the rest of his life.”

What do you call a little pumpkin who doesn’t listen to the crossing gourd?
Squash!

Q: Why did the pumpkin cross the road?
A: It fell off the wagon!