“Friends” star shown stealing beer

“Friends” star shown stealing beer

Pictures have emerged showing a David Schwimmer look-a-like stealing a 12 pack of beer from Blackpool, England store. The security video shows him looking right into the camera as he exits the store. Lancashire Constabulary sent Schwimmer a message in New York to question his whereabouts. Schwimmer swore he was innocent. Police responded with a tweet saying: “Thanks for being there for us,” a reference to the long-running sitcom’s theme tune.

My friend and I were at the local pub drinking the other night. I looked over and said, “Hey man, look at those two old drunk bastards over there. That’ll be us in a few more years”. He glanced over, looked at me and said, “You drunk idiot, that a mirror!”

How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened by the time she brings it.

If bartenders are not allowed to sell beer to drunk people, then why are McDonalds allowed to sell hamburgers to fat people.

What are the most common last words of rednecks?
“Well, hold my beer and watch this!”