A Biting Pain

A Biting Pain

Helen Richards of Australia, said she was “mid-stream” on the toilet when she felt a sharp pain in her rear-end. She jumped off and turned on the light. “When you’ve got your knickers and long pants around your ankles it’s hard to go anywhere,” she told 10 News. Richards said she snapped a quick photo of a python in the toilet bowl before piling some pots and pans on the toilet lid to keep it contained. A snake removal service got the beast and Helen got Bactine on her derriere. That’s life in Australia.

Did you hear about the woman that went out on her front porch at 7 AM and found a snake under the daily paper. She beat the snake to death with the paper and stomped it. It was really amazing, not that she killed the snake, but that the PD was there before 7:00 am.

The legend of St. Patrick is that he drove all the snakes out of Ireland and into law school.

“I always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite and furthermore always carry a small snake.”

Q: What do you call a snake who works for the government?
A: A civil serpent!