August 15 Humor

* “It’s so annoying when my dentist starts up a conversation while he’s working on my teeth,” one guy said to another.   “I know just what you mean,” replied his friend. “But my Uncle Edgar used to drive his dentist crazy.”   “How so?”   “He was ventriloquist.”

# Late at night one of the inmates at an insane asylum yelled out, “I am Napoleon.” Across the hall someone yelled back, “How do you know?”    Napoleon said, “God told me.”    From another room a voice yelled out, “I did not.”

#  Three ex-US presidents are caught in a tornado, and sent off to the land of OZ. They finally make it to the Emerald City and come before the great wizard. “What brings you before the great Wizard of Oz?”  Jimmy Carter stepped forward timidly: “I’ve come for some courage.”   “No problem.” says the wizard. “Who comes next before the great and powerful Oz?” Up stepped George Bush sadly and said, “I’m told by the American people that I need a heart.”   “I’ve heard it’s true,” said the Wizard. “Consider it done” and there was a great silence in the hall. Bill Clinton is just standing there looking around, but does not say a word. Irritated, the Wizard finally asked, “What do you want?” Clinton asks, “Is Dorothy here?”