December 1 Humor

After a priest performed a baptism at Sunday mass, one proud family spent a lot of time taking photographs. A month later the priest was again performing baptisms when he noticed the same family at the baptismal fount. “Did I not baptize your child a few weeks ago?” He asked the parents. “Yes.” the mother responded, “but the pictures didn’t turn out.”

A customer at the bar orders a drink and then he looks into his pocket, then he orders another drink, sips on it and looks in his pocket then he orders another drink, looks in his pocket and orders another, looks in his pocket and so on. The bartender asks, “What are you doing?  What is in your pocket?” The guy says. “It’s a picture of my wife. When she starts looking good to me, I know it’s time to go home.”

*A older lady asked the bus driver to tell her when the Greyhound bus got to Summerville. Then a few minutes later she asked if they were near Summerville yet. The driver replied he would tell her when they got there. As the ride continued the little lady would toddled to the front and asked if they were near Summerville yet, straining the patience of the driver.  Finally, the little lady fell asleep and the bus driver pulled into Summerville and opened the door and put out the little step then woke up the lady. She said “Thank you”. The bus driver asked “Don’t you want to get off Summerville?” “Oh no,” she replied, “My daughter said that when we go through Summerville I should take my pills.”