December 19 Humor

* As I made lunch for my granddaughter the telephone rang and the telemarketer on the other end said, “If you can answer one question you can win 10 free dance lessons.” Before I could respond he fired off the question. “You will be the lucky winner if you can tell me what Alexander Graham Bell invented.” Trying to discourage him I said, “I Don’t know.” He asked “What do you have in your hand right now?” I answered a bologna sandwich.” He yelled on the other end, “Congratulations, you have won and for having such a great sense of humor…”

@ My cousin went to a furniture store to apply for a salesman job opening they had advertised. When he got there for the interview there were three people ahead of him. While they took their turns being interviewed he started talking to shoppers and sold $2600 of furniture. He got the job.

@ Two elderly women were trying on shoes in our store. When I slipped the Shoe onto one woman’s foot, the end of my tie got caught beneath her heel. Unaware of my predicament, she stood up and  started walking toward the mirror. For a few seconds, I found myself crawling along the floor beside her trying to get her attention. “Look Martha”, her friend said. “He wants to go home with you.”