December 24 Humor

* As a mother with small children I treasured every chance I could get to get out of the house on my own. Whether rain, sleet, or snow I would go when ever my husband or babysitter would allow me. During a blizzard one time I made my way to the department store and to get a few things and just walk around. I realized how desperate I had been to get out of the house when the PA squawked the announcement: “Shopper you left your lights on.”

* Three young girls were having a heated argument while they shopped in a trendy store in Manhattan’s upper East side. “No, no, I feel strongly about this”, said the one with finality. “I want to pay for it with my mother’s credit card.”

@ In January 1991, I was being deployed to operation Desert Storm. Before boarding a C-141 transport I had to go through tight security. After a meticulous  x-ray of all my carry-on bags, I removed all metal objects from a uniform was finally able to pass in the metal detector without setting off the alarm. Just out of curiosity, I asked airmen operating a checkpoint, “Why did you make me go through all that”? “We want to be sure you aren’t carrying any weapons on board”, he said, handing me back my M-16 rifle.