December 30 Humor

# Watching television make me feel really insecure. I found out that our highways are not safe, our houses are not safe, and the public parks are not safe… There is good news though my underarms are completely protected.

@ The Beatles sang “All you need is love” and then they broke up.

* A dedicated union steward at a convention in Las Vegas decides to go into a brothel. He asked the madam, “Is this a union house?”   ” No, it’s not.”   “So, how much the girls earn?”  The madam says well, you pay me $100 house gets $80 and  the girl $20”” The man says, “”That’s terrible” and he stomps out. Finally, he finds a brothel where the madam says, “Yes, this is a union house””  The union steward asks “If I pay $100, what does a girl get?”   “She gets $80.”   “That’s great””  He says, “I’d like Tiffany.” The madam replies,  “I’m sure you would, but Sandra over here has seniority.”