December 8 Humor

* A man was an antique collector and one his prize dishes cracked right through the middle. He decided he would send away to the manufacturer in China to get replicas made to exactly match the material and pattern. He gave them very specific instructions to match the pattern and even sent the insured old plate to them as a sample. Several weeks later he got his shipment. The original cracked plate was returned and the six others he ordered were also cracked in exactly the same way.

* Although I am of Chinese descent, I never really learn to speak Chinese. One evening, I came home boasting about a wonderful meal I’d had in Chinatown. Unfortunately, I couldn’t remember the name of the restaurant but was able to write the Chinese character that was on the door and show it to my mother. “Do you know what this says?” Mom asked with a smile. It says “pull”.

@ An avid Browns fan went to the corner pub with his dog. He had to do a lot of talking to convince the owner to allow the pup to stay in the bar while the game was on. The dog was well behaved during the game and mostly watched the TV and the bar patrons. In the fourth quarter the Browns kicked a field goal and the dog went nuts. He barked and jumped and wagged his tail and licked everyone. The bartender was impressed. He asked the owner, “What does that dog do when the Browns score a touchdown?” The owner explained, “I don’t know. I have only had him two years.”