February 18th Jokes

* A man took his wife to the livestock show and they looked at champion breeding bulls. The wife said, “Look here. It says that this bull mated over 150 times last year isn’t that something?” The man in reply said, “Yes, but it wasn’t all with the same cow.”

@ When I was notified of my long-awaited promotion to Marine Corps major: I quickly purchased a set of gold oak leaves, even though the actual ceremony was months away. “Look, Logan”, I said to my five-year-old son. “These are what daddy will be wearing in a few months.”  As he stared into the box, Logan wore a puzzled expression, he looked up at me and asked, “Earrings?”

The U.S. has been spying on German Chancellor Angela Merkel for more than 10 years. Merkel actually called Obama to say that eavesdropping on allies “Is not acceptable.”  Then Obama said, “Yeah, well, that’s not what you said to England.”