February 20th Jokes

Two opposing candidates for county office happened to be sitting next to each other at a local diner. The first candidate said, “I always tip the waitress’s real well and then ask them to vote for me,” he said. Candidate number two replied, “Oh  really,  I always tip them a nickel and ask them to vote for you.”

@ Maybe rain or sleet or snow will not delay the mail, but there are some other factors like lack of faith in the system.  I listened as the man ahead of me was getting forms for temporarily stopping the mail delivery and a change of address. “When you have them filled out,” suggested the postal clerk, “bring them back to the post office personally so they don’t get lost in the mail.”

I used to be a heavy gambler. But now I just make mental bets. That is how I lost my mind.