January 4 Humor

* Working as a stockman one of my least favorite jobs was cleaning up spills in the store. One time, I got paged to clean up at one of the registers. As I worked with my pail and mop I noticed a lady just staring at the whole procedure with a slight smile.   I asked her, “May I help you?”   ‘Oh no” she said with a laugh, “I just love to watch men mop.”

# The doctor was an avid fly fisherman as was his partner in the surgery. So while they were performing a procedure using local anesthetic, they started talking our fly fishing. The patient piped up, “I don’t think you should be talking about fly fishing while you are operating on me.”   The rejoinder came: “that is all right, we talk about operations while we are fishing.”

# Three surgeons were bragging about their skills.” A man came to me who had his hand cut off,” said number one. “Today that man is a concert violinist.” “That’s nothing,” said number two, “A guy came to me with had both his legs cut off. I was able to put them back on and today that man is a marathon runner.” “I can top both of you,” said the third. “One day I came on the scene of a terrible accident in Amish country. There was nothing left but a horse’s posterior and a pair of glasses. Today that man is seated in the United States Senate.”