June 18th Humor

* Our daughter was at an Army retreat in the back woods of Georgia for a leadership training exercise. She had to spend 6 weeks living in the woods in primitive conditions. She called home one weekend and explained she had met one of the men and she was interested in him. She explained, “but because we are not allowed to wear makeup,  he really has no idea what I look like.”

@ The patient was given the good news after years of therapy and medication the doctor declared him cured of his delusion that he was Napoleon.  “Oh wonderful,” the man exclaimed, “May I use the phone, I need to call Josephine and tell her the news.”

“You seem to be in some distress,” said the kindly judge to the witness. “Is anything the matter?” “Well, your Honor,” said the witness, “I swore to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, but every time I try, some lawyer objects.”