March 12 Humor

* My daughter works for  a commercial lawyer who is very short. When Jean arrived in court with a bulging briefcase. the lawyer for the other party, was a Goliath of a man.  When the big guy caught sight of Jean he cried out across the courtroom, “Well, little man, what have you got in that briefcase?” Without looking up, Jean replied, “Five smooth stones.”

* A doctor was appearing  as an expert witness on behalf of a man injured in a car accident and was being badgered by an overbearing attorney. “You say doctor that you are familiar with the symptoms of a brain concussion. Is that correct.” “Yes it is.”  “Well then doctor please tell me and the jury if you and I were riding in a car and another car struck us at high speed such that our heads were banged together, in your opinion that we would suffer a concussion?”  “It is my opinion,” replied the doctor, “that I would and you would not.”

@ The environmental science class was taking a walk through the local arboretum as the teacher pointed out all the tree types and the details of how nature was getting ready for the winter season. The teacher turned to the class and asked, “Can anyone tell me what we might expect to see here in another 50 years?” One young lady volunteered, “A shopping center?”