May 21st Humor

* Two palookas had both taken money to throw a fight. They sparred for a couple of rounds and then by accident one guy actually hit the other with a punch. The fighter immediately swooned and fell to the mat, thereby winning his bribe. The other fighter paced around the ring knowing he was in trouble now. As the referee counted, the potential winner had a brain storm. He ran over to his prostrate opponent and kicked him. That disqualified him and the other fighter was declared the winner.

A woman was telling friends how her Red Cross first aid classes had prepared her for an emergency. “I saw woman hit by a car, she said she had a broken arm, a twisted knee and a skull fracture.” “How horrible. What did you do?” “Thanks to my first aid training I knew just how to handle it. I sat on the curb and put my head between my knees to keep from fainting.”

Two engineers were walking home, and they saw a scantily clad, hot girl standing on the side of the road on a bike. When they walked up to her, she said “You can take either my clothes or my bike.” The one engineer had to hurry home, so he walked on while his friend talked to her. A few minutes later, his friend reappeared, riding a bicycle. When he pulled up close to the other engineer, he was complimented on his choice. He laughed, then said “Yeah, it’s a really good bike, and besides, her clothes weren’t my size!”