October 19 Humor

@ As a college professor, my husband has published several books. When he finished his latest book, I stopped at the supermarket to get some treats and bought some ice cream and champagne. As the clerk bagged my purchases she asked, “Celebrating something?”   “Yes”, I replied, “My husband just finished a book.”  The young lady thought for a moment and asked, “Is he a slow reader?”

* Here are five things you don’t want to hear from computer tech support:   Number one,  “duuude bummer”      Number two, “in layman’s terms we call that the Hindenburg effect”       Number three, “your problem can be fixed but you’re going to need a butter knife, a roll of duct tape and a car battery'”     Number four, “press one for support, press two  if you are with 60 minutes. press three, if you’re with the FTC.   Hold on a second,  Mom, Timmy is hitting me again.”

* A fellow computer programmer in our group that designs software for one of our largest accounts requested my assistance in an installation. At first, he handled most of the work, with me just doing corrections and inputting data. Eventually, though, he asked me to help with the last phase of the training. When I sat down with one woman and told her I would be showing her out to make changes to the files, she sighed with relief. “I’m so glad you’re teaching me instead of him”. Surprised,  I replied that my colleague was far more experienced than I was. “Yes”, she said, “but I feel much more comfortable with you. I get really nervous around smart people.”