October 7th Humor

* The minister was playing golf with one of the parishioners and thought it might be time to slip in some moral guidance. “I have noticed that the best golfers don’t swear when the are the course.” His partner swept a load of topsoil into the air and said, “What the hell do they have to swear about.”

Mrs. Smith took her cat to the veterinarian. The doctor had her hold the animal on the examining table as he touched and gently squeezed it in then walked slowly around the table, all the while looking back and forth, back and forth. When it was time, he gave the cat some medication. He presented Mrs. Smith with the bill. “What, $150 for two pills?” “Not just for the pills,” said the vet. “I gave her a CAT scan too.”

* Isn’t it funny that men will blame fate for every mistake, but take personal credit for a hole in one.