* What do you get when you play a country music song backwards? You get your wife back, you get your truck back and you stop drinking.

* A tourist stopped at a country gas station. While the car was being serviced, he noticed an old-timer basking in the sun as a piece of rope in his hand. The tourist walked up the old-timer and asked “What do you have there?”  “That’s a weather gage, Sonny,” the old-timer repled.   “How can you possibly tell the weather with a piece of rope?”   “It’s simple,” said the old-timer.   “When it swings back and forth, it’s windy and when it gets wet, it’s raining.”

@ In New York City, every rainbow has an empty pot of gold at the end of it with a chalk outline of a dead leprechaun.