* There were only two people in the New York Subway car. An elderly woman and a young man. They arrived at their common stop and the doors opened. The young man spryly popped out and walked briskly to the exit gate. He stopped there and held it open for the lady as she ambled along. When she got there she thanked him for his kindness and said, “I am not used to such good manners in New York City.”   The young man tipped his ball cap and explained, “You will have to forgive me, but I am from out of town myself and I did not know any better.”

@ I worked myself up from nothing state of extreme poverty.    I would not join the kind of Country Club that would have me as a member.- Groucho Marx

# A couple of the guys that worked at the hospital walked into the cafeteria and John slipped on the floor fell down and broke his arm. They called for the paramedics and put him on a gurney and rolled him out of the cafeteria. As he passed the curious diners on the gurney he called out. “It was the Chicken, Don’t eat the chicken.”