* My neighbor’s dog is so smart that he went to obedience school and he knows how to fetch, heel and beg. Now he is going back to teach him how to do text messages.

@”Why do cowboys wear their Stetson hats pushed up on the sides?”  “I don’t know Jake why?”   “So that three people can fit in the pickup truck.”

* An avid Browns fan went to the corner pub with his dog. He had to do a lot of talking to convince the owner to allow the pup to stay in the bar while the game was on. The dog was well behaved during the game and mostly watched the TV and the bar patrons. In the fourth quarter the Browns kicked a field goal and the Dog went nuts. He barked and jumped and wagged his tail and licked everyone. The bar tender was impressed. He asked the owner, “What does that dog do when the Browns score a touchdown?” The owner explained, “I don’t know. I have only had him two years.”