* A ship carrying 4000 Kia automobiles sank after colliding with an oil tanker. The Hyundai officials calculated the loss of cars at over $3000.

@ A haggard man walked into the psychiatrist’s office tore open a cigarette and stuffed the loose tobacco up his nose.  The doctor watched and commented, “I can see that you really need me.”   The man responded, “I sure do Doc, have you got a light.”

@ I do not smoke, but sometimes I chew tobacco. If you don’t blow your smoke on me, I won’t spit on you.