* My father-in-law, who owned a used car lot, received an early-morning call from Han, the Vietnamese immigrant he had hired as a handyman. Han had heard a radio report about a blizzard that was headed their way he was worried about the cars outside in the lot. My father-in-law assured him that they would be fine where they were. Han then asked where the toilet tissue was because he was going to clean the restrooms, he was told it was locked office cabinet. “I don’t understand American ideas”, he sighed. “Thousands of dollars worth of cars outside in the storm. but toilet paper is under lock and key.

 @ The checkout line I was waiting in grew longer as the only clerk tried to understand a man was carrying on a monologue in Spanish. The frazzled clerk looked desperately for someone who could translate. Finally, a bilingual employee appeared andtook care of the transaction, the clerk sighed with relief as he called the next young lady. She approached, smiled warmly and said, “Bonjour”.

* Wife: “Honey, did you notice? I bought a new toilet brush”.     Husband: “Yes, I did, but I still prefer the paper”.