* When I was a college junior, my roommate and I climbed Mount Whitney. It took three days to get to the top and back, and we returned home completely exhausted. Visiting my parents soon after the grueling hike, I walked into our living room, where they were conversing with the neighbor. I told them every detail of my treck: how high the mountain was, how steep the trail and how we fought fatigue and altitude sickness all the way. “I know how difficult it is”, our neighbors said, “I took my Brownie troop there last year.”

@ Mark Twain was famous for debating people. He got into a debate with a Mormon about polygamy. The Morman asked Twain, “Can you tell me one verse of the bible that says polygamy is forbidden?” Twain sucked up a deep breath and said, “Sure, it says in there somewhere, No man can serve two masters.”

# What do you call a handsome, intelligent man in Detroit? A Tourist.