Santa may not be coming

Bad news for everybody looking forward to holly jolly merrymaking. Santa may not be coming to town this year… The world is struggling with a serious Santa shortage. As a result, some Christmas events — both public and private — may have to go without a visit from Kris Kringle. Not that fat men are in short supply, but take the International Brotherhood of Real-Bearded Santas (IBRBS). The membership of the organization fell from 2,000 to 1,400 just in 2020. . So, the substitute Santas went to do less jolly jobs. Some Santas have decided to hang up their red suits for good. That means there are fewer Santas to go around than usual. You know that when supply goes down and demand goes up, so do the prices. Hiring a Santa this Christmas costs a lot more than it did three years ago. That means some events simply can no longer afford a visit from Kris Kringle. The costs of becoming a Santa have gone up as well due to Bidenomics. Everything from Santa suits to the Uber fares they need to get to events has gone up in price. Finally, merrymakers now want the visiting Santa to have a real beard instead of a fake one. Again, that increases the demand for real-bearded Santas, who again have to raise their prices to cope.

Maybe if Santas got more respect…75-year-old Mick Worrall, dressed as Santa Claus was famous every Christmas season. Mick pulled his wheeled sleigh behind his three wheeled motorcycle through the streets of Worcester, England. Every year he would ride, stopping frequently to hand candy and cuddly toys to youngsters and collecting donations. Mick has raised thousands of dollars for charity dressing up as Santa and this year was collecting for New Hope Worcester Children’s Charity. The organization works with families who have children with disabilities and complex health care needs. This year a zealous traffic cop stopped him right downtown and told him he could not drive is sleigh anymore. That led to a confrontation and when a small crowd gathered on Santa’s side it became a test of wills. The officer tried to give Santa a ticket for parking the sleigh in a pedestrian zone and Santa told him to mail the ticket to his office. When asked where that was, Santa replied, “The North Pole.” Santa vowed “I won’t let the children down. I get pleasure from putting smiles on the faces of the children.” The angry Santa added, “I’m a bit disappointed – but it’s not going to stop me. I’ve been doing it for years. “I will go to court dressed as Santa if I have to. I’m not paying a penny in fines when I’m collecting money for charity,” the angry Santa said. Last year a policeman even posed with me for newspaper pictures. Maybe the cop was having a bad day but it was petty sad.” Worcester City Council spokesperson said they would not comment on this Grinch case. Some of the Moms and Dads in the crowd that assembled around Santa and rogue cop paid the fine so Christmas can continue.

Ho, Ho, Ho’s

Santa has been reading all your posts.
Most of you are getting Christmas dictionaries.

Dear Santa….
All I want for Christmas is a fat bank account and a slim body. Please do not mix it up like last year.

How much did Santa pay for his sleigh?
Nothing, it was on the house.

Everybody knows that Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer leads Santa’s sleigh team…
but few know that Bruno the Brown Nosed Reindeer is the second in line.
He can fly as fast as Rudolph, but he isn’t as quick to stop.

December 22nd Birthdays

1999  – G. Hannelius,  1974 – Heather Donahue,  1968 – Dina Meyer, 1993 – Aliana Lohan

1971 – Ted Cruze, 1963 – Ralph Fiennes, 1959 – Robin Gibb, 2000  – Joshua Bassett

Morning Motivator:

“What lies behind us and what lies before us are small matters
compared to what
stands before us.