March 31 Humor

 * For several years, my job was to answer all of the phone calls and mail concerning the daytime television soap operas our company produced. One day a woman called wanting medical advice from an actor who protayed a doctor on one of the shows. I explained that the man wasn’t a real doctor couldn’t help her. After a moment of shocked silence, the woman replied indignantly, “No wonder it takes his patients months to recover.”

@  The judge had gotten involved with the testimony dealing with a cantankerous Kentucky Colonel. Unable to get straight answers from the man the judge said: “They call you a Colonel, what regiment were you in?” The man drawled, “Wall, you see the Colonel in front of my name is like the honorable in front of your name it don’t mean nothin’.”

# I had just spent 3 hours arguing with the bureau of motor vehicles while waiting in several lines and on the way home I stopped at the store to get something for my son. I approached the register with the baseball bat and the clerk asked, “Cash or charge”? I snapped “Cash” at her and then apologizing for my tone, explained I had just been mistreated at the License Bureau. Giving me my change she asked, “Do you want this in a bag or are you going right back there.”