* Two young men were riding the train from work and Pete noticed Mike had his eyes tightly closed as the train stopped and started and rolled along. Pete asked Mike. “What is the matter, don’t you feel well?” Mike replied, “I feel OK. It is just that I cannot bear to see a woman standing”

@ A passenger cornered a pilot in the terminal and asked, “How can you fly the plane at night?”   The pilot explained, “There is a red light on the left wing and a green light on the right wing and a white light on the tail. All I have to do is keep the airplane between the lights.”

@ Flying home from a visit to my daughter in Albany, New York we encountered a lot of turbulence. The pilot, reassuring us that we would shortly fly above the rough weather, reminded us to keep our seatbelts fastened and remain in our seats. Soon after, he got back on the intercom, lifted the restrictions and said, “If you wish, you may now unfasten your seatbelts and walk around a bit, but stay inside”.