December 16 Humor

Seargeant Friday spat out the accusation: “You admit having broken into the same dress shop four times. What did you steal?”   “A dress for my wife.” Friday countered, “then why did you get back again and again?” The perp replied, “She made me change it three times.”

* How is a divorce in North Dakota like a hurricane in Florida? Either way, you lose the trailer.

* A couple went to a lawyer to dissolve their marriage In order to get them to reconcile, the lawyer warned the irate wife that if she divorced they would have to split everything 50/50. “You mean all the money I have in the bank? “Yes, mam, he will get half.”  “What about the furniture?”  “He will get the bedroom and living room stuff and you will get the kitchen and the dining room.” The wife got a sly smile and asked, “What about the 3 children?” The counselor thought for a moment and then said, “go back and live together until the fourth child is born and then you can split the children two and two.” The wife replied, “No you don’t, if I depended on him I would not have the three children I have now.”