January 23 Humor

@ A woman went to the police station to report her husband as a missing person. She described him as 29 years old, tall, dark and handsome. The officer taking the report said, “I know your husband he is 48, short and dumpy.” The woman responded “Yes he is, but who would want him back.”

@ Our yard was a gathering spot for our five children’s friends. One summer night we all played hide-and-seek and had so much fun we lost track of time. Unknown to me, a police officer had cruised by and noticed my 16-year-old daughter running, then ducking into the shadows. The officer stopped her and asked if she knew how late it was. He demanded to know where her parents were.  “Well,” she replied, “Mom is up in that tree, and I haven’t found dad yet.”

@ John Smith had the misfortune to be a witness to an armed robbery. The police came and began to take statements. The investigating officer approached him and asked his name.   He answered “John Smith.”   The cop replied, “Cut the comedy and give me your name.”    “All right,” John replied, “put me down as Winston Churchill.”    The cop said, “That’s more like it, you cannot pull that John Smith crap on me.”