Withdrawal Denied

Withdrawal Denied

A Corpus Christi Texas contractor became trapped inside an ATM kiosk of a Bank of America branch. The man was changing the lock inside a room connected to the ATM and locked himself inside. When people came to the ATM to get cash, the contractor slipped notes through the receipt slot begging for help since he left his cellphone in his truck. People using the ATM thought he was joking. One person didn’t take it as a joke and called the police. “We come out here, and sure enough we can hear a little voice coming from the machine. So we are thinking this is a joke. It’s got to be a joke,” said Richard Olden, the Senior Officer. The police got him out.

My friend keeps saying “cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water.” I know he means well.

Today is my first day at the gym. I walk in and see a bunch of hot women working out. I walk up to the guy who is running the gym and ask him, ” Sir, what machine should I use to impress the ladies over there?” He smiles at me and says, ” Try the ATM Machine in the lobby.”

I’m so broke, I went to check my account balance at the ATM…
And it printed me out a coupon for Ramen Noodles

What was the one legged man doing at the ATM?
Checking his balance