Orange man cometh

Duane Hansen lives in Syracuse, Nebraska, and “enjoys growing large pumpkins, gourds and other vegetables as a hobby,” the city’s Facebook post said. Duane asked Bellevue city officials to serve as witnesses for his record-setting attempt. He set out from the public boat docks in Bellevue, Nebraska, at about 7:30 a.m. Hansen’s wife, family and friends were also there to document the journey with some of them following him in a proper boat just in case his world record attempt ran into any trouble. “When we first got started it went real quick, the first five miles felt like nothing. Once we got about 18 miles in, it started feeling like ‘wow, this is a long trip.’ Hansen claimed the world record at the 577 river mile marker that was 25.5 miles. He continued going to Nebraska City for a total of 41 miles. Duane paddled down the Missouri River in a “boat” made from a hollowed-out pumpkin to celebrate his 60th birthday. The pumpkin vessel had the name “SS Berta” written on the back and had a cupholder carved into the hull. Guinness World Records said it will review an application and evidence to determine if this pumpkin trip was a record setter. The previous record for longest journey by pumpkin boat was 25.5 miles, set in 2018, according to the Guinness World Records website.

Duane”s daughter Morgan Buchholz, said, “I’m so proud of my dad … He has always said that you can do anything you want and how can you not believe somebody who goes out and does exactly what he wants.” Duane’s sister Yvonne Hansen came back from San Diego to handle the trip-day paperwork to document for the Guinness world’s record. Dangers faced included rocky shores and shallow sand bars. The pumpkin would take on water from the wakes left by passing boats. Even waving to the curious folks on the bank posed the danger of tipping. “You’ve got to be on top of it the whole time – the whole time.” Duane said “not swamping it” was the biggest challenge. Hansen got the inspiration: “I was at a giant pumpkin growing seminar in Portland, Ore., and I met this lady that had the record. And I asked her a lot of questions and that’s when I decided I wanted to do this.” With netting and misting and everything it takes to “defy” the laws of physics, Hansen is known for 200 to 400 pound pumpkins, so Big Berta is special at 861 pounds. She was cut from the vine while growing at 15 pounds per day, with a circumference of 146 inches.: “I’ve been trying to do this – to grow a giant pumpkin – for eight or 10 years. It’s that tough. Duane said.” When his wife Allyson was asked what’s it’s like to be married to a world record holder, she said stressful.  “I never know what’s going to be next.”

Maybe he should work with Dale Marshall, who previously set the state record with a 2,051-pound pumpkin at the 2019 Alaska State Fair. Dale broke his own record this year with a massive gourd he dubbed “Cookie Monster.” Marshall said he used an Atlantic Giant seed and Cookie Monster came in at 2,147 pounds. Marshall said he believes his pumpkin would have grown even larger if there had been more sunny weather over the summer. “If it got a little more daylight, it could have been bigger,” he said. Dale fell short of the 2,702-pound Guinness World Record by Italian farmer Stefano Cutrupi.

Pumpkin Puns

After a minor mathematical error on a routine report, a worker’s boss tried to belittle him in front of his peers. Angrily she asked, “If you had 4 pumpkins and I asked you for one, how many would you have left?” Quickly he replied, “If it was you who asked, I’d still have 4 pumpkins.”

Always a seasonal delight, today we will look at how to make a pumpkin roll:
Step 1. Get a pumpkin.
Step 2. Take your pumpkin to the top of a hill.
Step 3. Give it a little push.

Q: Why do Jack-o-lanterns have wicked smiles?
A: Because they just had their brains scooped out!

Why do New Zealanders always do well at rowing?
Because it combines the two things they are best at,
sitting down, and going backward….

September 2nd  Birthdays

1948 – Krista McAuliffe, 1955 – Linda Purl, 1966 – Salma Hayek, 1987 – Spencer Smith

1964 – Keanu Reeves,  1948 – Terry Bradshaw, 1951 – Mark Harmon, 1984 – Jake Ryan

Morning Motivator:

A smile improves your face value. Orange you glad you asked?

Rhymes with orange