* The angry customer at the truck stop demanded, “What you call this slop, tea or coffee? It tastes more like gasoline.” The waitress replied, “If it tastes like gasoline, I guarantee its coffee. Our tea tastes like dishwater.”
# A hypocrite is someone who complains there is too much sex and violence on his VCR.
* Years ago my youngest daughter asked, “Daddy where do clouds come from”? Trying to think of an analogy I pointed to the coffee pot sitting on the stove. “Pretend that the water in the coffee pot is the ocean, and the burner is like the sun. The sun warms the ocean, it creates a mist of water, and then clouds form”. She seemed to understand. At breakfast a few days later she suddenly looked up at me and said, “Dad, I was just wondering. What happens to the clouds if everybody stops drinking coffee?”