* Author’s quips: “I’m looking for a book, but I only know the title not the author It is called Dante’s Inferno”. “Do you have Shakespeare in English? ”  “Can you tell me who the author of Shakespeare is?”

* Socialite A: “Darling, I read your book last night. Who wrote it for you?    Socialite author: “I am so glad you liked it. Who read it to you?”

@ While we vacationed in Maine I went down to the general store to get a paper. Unfamiliar with the various editions I asked the proprietor if this was the morning or the evening paper? He replied, “Son, the papers up here are delivered once a day, If you read it in the morning it is the morning paper and if your read it at night it is the evening paper.”