December 18th Humor

# Hall of fame pitcher Lefty Gomez was not a very good hitter. When asked if he  ever had broken a bat he replied, “Only one time, when I ran over it backing out of the garage.”

“How do you like the new minister?” A customer asked one of the merchants in small town.    “I haven’t heard him preach, but I like him fine,” said the merchant. “How can you like him if you haven’t heard him?”   ‘I know that he is good, because everyone in town is beginning to pay off their bills.”

My friend Anna and I were eating in a Chinese restaurant. When an elderly waiter set chopsticks at our places, Anna made a point of reaching into her purse and pulling out her own pair. “As an environmentalist,” she declared, “I do not approve of destroying nature  for use as throwaway utensils.” The waiter inspected her chopsticks carefully and commented, “They are the very beautiful, made of Elephant Ivory.”