Take a deep breath

Rainer Schimpf, 51, Like the Bible’s Jonah was swept into the mouth of a large Bryde’s whale off the coast of the South Africa while filming a sardine run last month. “Looming up out of darkness below came a Bryde’s whale shooting up into the ball of fish, gulping all in its path.” Schimpf’s wife, Silke, watched on in horror from their boat, his legs were hanging from the mammal’s mouth during the incident. “I felt some pressure around my waist and I immediately knew what had happened. The whale accidentally included me in its mouth together with its main meal – the sardines. Then he realized its mistake and opened his mouth, releasing me. I was washed out with tons of water from its mouth,” Rainer said. “We swam back to the vessel, climbed up and checked if I and the camera were OK – no broken bones, no cracked ribs – so all was good.”

 

Orca-strated humor

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible. The little girl said, “When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah”. The teacher asked, “What if Jonah went to hell?” The little girl replied, “Then you ask him.”

They say whales are going extinct…
…but have you been to Golden Corral recently?

Why is it that people are so delighted and amazed when they see a whale leap from the ocean and crash back into the water, but I do one belly flop in the pool and suddenly I’m a jerk?

My wife has a whale tattooed on her belly. It used to be a dolphin.

 

December 28th Birthdays

1981 – Sienna Miller, 1934 – Maggie Smith, 1981 – Elaine Hendricks
1954 – Denzel Washington, Seth Meyers, 1990 – David Archuleta, 1998 – Nash Greir

 

Morning Motivator

What the mind can conceive and believe, you can achieve

 

A whale of a tale

Watch being eaten like a sardine